Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Look here - No, Here!

Last year, Sabrina promised up and down and sideways that she would happily sit on Santa’s lap for a picture. Instead, she walked up, got within 15 feet of the man, and lost her mind. For the next half hour I cajoled, begged, and bribed her in an effort to get 1 lousy picture. At someone, the patron saint of photography must have pressed the shutter because we did get a shot where she didn’t look like I’d just poured spiders in her milk. I grabbed that print and ran, sweaty and completely stressed out, praying that next year be better.

We started out today with 2 excited, happy kids proclaiming their affection for Santa and reciting the lists of items they planned to request. I thought that as long as the line of people didn’t wrap around the entire man, we were golden (this is why we went before Thanksgiving). Ha ha ha ha, man, I laugh at my own bravado.

Sammy and Sabrina love Santa for sure, but they can’t pose for a picture to save their lives. And I did get close to threatening those lives at one point, so I can vouch for the truth of that statement. They have 2 issues that can occur singly or in tandem: not actually looking at the camera and freaky weird “smiles.” I have GOT to figure out another word for them to say because Cheese (or more specifically, “Cheeeeeeeeeeeese”) results in a scary grimace of strain that is anything but happy. And I have no idea why they can’t keep their eyes on the round circle of the lens (no, it’s not a flash issue, they just look everywhere but the camera), but nearly every shot contains 1 or the both of them giving sideways glances or looking down like they’re (not so)subtly trying to see if they dripped soup on their shirts.

I have no idea how many pictures were snapped all told, but it took 2 sessions with Santa (plus a break at the bookstore) to get 1 that was close to acceptable. And again, I grabbed that print and ran screaming away, pulling 2 limp children behind me).

The photo elf was an angel, taking shot after shot with a good measure of patience, and kindly going through every one with me on an extremely slow computer. Mall HR, she deserves a raise.

Thank goodness this is a once a year proposition. That said, I’m terrified of what these kids will come up with next year to screw with me. Let the holidays begin!


  1. See, I just throw crying Elizabeth at the Santa and buy that picture. I am very impressed with your persistence. And this year's picture is excellent!

  2. Santa looks a little...annoyed. It's gonna be a long month for him.

  3. I have not attempted pictures with Santa yet (and I mean any year, not just this one.) And a few months ago I had to start telling Kalena "show me your teeth!" to get an appropriate smile. Definitely sounds weird when you're saying it in public.

  4. Julie you just have to put paint all over her and she'll look RIGHT at the camera! http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-yj0l4hlFqOs/TqHX5BdouzI/AAAAAAAANjU/fGkVzNwQclk/s400/111021_Sabrina+%25285%2529.JPG
    It's a cute photo of them on Santa, give yourself some credit! You did good.