This Always Happens at Least Once

Whoops, almost forgot about this today... almost.

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I'm not feeling so hot today, so of course I have a meeting in my house where I have to talk tonight.  So please enjoy this picture of my kids.

Finish Line

I was all cozy in my bed when I remembered that it's still November, and I have one last post necessary to call this finished.  So this is it.  Whew.  Just under the line.

I also have to make sure that elf has properly situated himself in a new location for tomorrow or small heads will explode. 

Good night.  See you soon.

Things I Learned at Costco

• The Tuesday before Thanksgiving might as well be Black Friday for all the people.  Holy crow.
• Everything can be made better with a churro.
• Somebody really does buy those giant teddy bears.
• Someone really does buy 35 spiral hams (and man is he gonna have the gout).
• If I didn't already have a 21 lb. turkey defrosting in my refrigerator, I would have bought one of their $30 stuffed turkey breasts and called it done.
• Sample people, don't set up your stands like you're good to go and then proceed to cook your wares from their frozen state.  That's just mean. 
• Seriously, whither the wine samples?

Bullets

• I am mostly recovered from my cold, but my voice hasn't.  The upside is I can belt out a mean "Smelly Cat."
• Our school district has always held a turkey drive this time of year, but apparently the FDA listened to the lobbyist turkeys and we can no longer collect frozen birds.  It's a canned food drive this year instead.  I am not complaining about that because my kids can carry in their own canned goods.
• My children seem to think that "being too excited" about fill-in-the-blank is an acceptable reason to stay up after bedtime. I am too excited about them going to bed.  I win.
• My radio station switched over to Christmas music Wednesday.  I'm all for Christmas, but I'm also super pro-Thanksgiving, so I'm torn.  But it's also 80 degrees here, so maybe Christmas music is a tidge hard to listen to right now.
• Sabrina asked me if we could make one of those wind sock people use see blowing around outside car dealerships.  I appreciate her crafting ambition, but I'm pretty sure even Martha Stewart would say, "Now, Girl..."
• That's all I got today.

Under the Wire

I held a meeting tonight where no one showed up, the weather is about to turn super nasty when I'm supposed to be sleeping, and if I hadn't seen Elsha comment on one of my posts, I would have forgotten about this altogether.  I'm halfway through this months, and I'm not going to let a little chaos take me down.  But this is all I got tonight.  (Thanks, Elsha!)

My Own Weather Man

I've known for a few years that one of my neighbors works for a storm tracking service.  Wait, let me rephrase.  I've know that a neighbor has a fancy jeep with a lot of antennae and a sky warn logo on the side, so I assume he works as a tracker or is some kind of Twister-style enthusiast.  I jog by said jeep several times a week and wonder exactly what it is he does.

This afternoon, Sabrina wanted to play with the girl who lives across the street, who was conveniently hanging around outside.  So we went over and asked if she could come play for awhile.  As we were about to cross the street, I saw a car coming out of the corner of my eye, so we stopped to wait.  Hello, Storm Jeep.  Well, Storm Jeep didn't just roll on by - it slowed to a stopped as Neighbor Guy rolled down his window to tell us we were under a tornado warning and to get inside.  For emphasis, he leaned back to show us his way cool radar step up in the passenger seat, all blinking with reds and greens where a storm looked like it was about to barrel down on us.  I thanked him and told him we'd head inside right away.  He nodded and went on, presumably to launch tiny round robots out of a trash can somewhere.

Given that Texas weather is completely unpredictable and can rain veritable hellfire down at a moment's notice, I was grateful for the extra warning.  And even more grateful that the storm fell apart and we didn't have to worry about it for long.  I would like to enlist his services come April when the weather really gets crankin'.

Just a cool little thing that happened today.

Frustration, I Know You Well

I had every intention of putting together an entertaining or even thought-provoking post today, but I have just spent the last 4 hours putting lights on our new Christmas tree, including a trip to Walmart in the middle, and I'm still a strand short.  Insert expletives of choice here.

If it weren't already nearly 9 PM and I didn't have a number of other things (including this post) that need to get done before I go to bed, I would totally go back to get that strand so I can just finish the darn thing.  This comes as a surprise to exactly no one.

Perhaps tomorrow will be the day.  But then again, I might just throw up a 3 year old picture and call it a night, too.  I'm such an enigma.

Tidbits

I am slowly but surely making progress on my Christmas shopping, I think.  I really need to pull out all the gifts I've bought so I can assess, but that depends on 2 things, 1) I can actually find where I've hidden everything, and 2) I don't have extra eyes watching my movements.  Chris is off this week and the kids the next.  So, December?

I do have some difficult to buy for people left on my list, and this annoys me.  I'd like to have everything thought out by now, or at least an inkling of a plan, but... bupkis.  Serious blankness.

We have 3 Thanksgivings in the next week.  Stretchy pants ahoy!

This morning, I got up early to sign up Sabrina's scout troop for special cookie sales that won't actually happen for over 2 months.  But if you want the prime locations and times, you had to get in on early pre-dawn shenanigans.  I was watching this business like it was the last 3 seconds of an eBay auction.  Whatever, I got 1 of only 2 slots at a very high traffic spot.  Victory!  Booyah!

Yes, this was the highlight of my day.

Well, not entirely.  I did get my husband's Christmas gift, and he is notoriously hard to gift.  Never mind his birthday is hot on the heel of the Christmas season and I'll soon be scrambling again.  I'll take my moment.

Aaaand that's all I got, Folks.  See ya tomorrow.

Weather or Not

Today was a dreary, cold, wet day.  For me, this means I want to hunker down on the sofa in my cozy clothes and do nothing more strenuous than watch whatever movie happens to be on TV (Ocean's Eleven FTW!). 

Chris is the opposite, I think.  He just can't sit still and has to find an activity outside the house.  He uses the kids as an excuse ("They need to get out and get some exercise!"), but I know it's mostly because he's antsy.  You'd think I'd know this about him by now, but it surprises me every single time.  I mean, really?  Who doesn't love couch time?

So I wonder, if the weather isn't the best, do you embrace your inner sloth or do you need a distraction?  And if you're the distraction type, maybe you could come hang with Chris so he doesn't drive me nuts.

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Well, somehow, it's 9:20 PM, and I haven't posted for the day.  This is because I forgot.  (Points for honesty?)  I was wrapped up in Girl Scout cookie logistics and my brain is completely fried.  So, I'm asking for a pass today.  I really want to keep up with this write every day in November commitment, but I'm pretty sure you don't want to read about my frustrations with the cookie accounting system.  I'm pretty sure I don't want to even know there is a cookie accounting system.

Oh, I can tell you about one thing - I used the Target Cartwheel app for the first time today, and boy, is that smooth.  The first time I looked at it several months ago, it required a Facebook account link, but I wasn't (and still am not) cool with that, but this time, I could enter my e-mail, and whoosh I was off.  So easy.  Highly recommend.

Perhaps tomorrow, I shall regale you with an edge of your seat story that will be the best thing you've read on the internet ever.  Or maybe I'll talk about macaroni and cheese.  It's a toss up.

I Got the Power (No I Don't)

Ever hear the question, "If you could have any superpower, which one would you choose?"  I've given the matter (too much) thought, and I always come back to the same answer: teleportation.  I mean, come on.  No more traffic.  No more how much does gas cost these days.  No more how much does airfare cost these days.  And no transit time.  Just blink and you're there.  Need a little Tahitian break?  Blink.  Beach.

I'd also venture to say the definition of teleportation would have to include movement of objects as well as your person, so you want that soda out of the fridge?  Blink.  Bed not made?  Blink.  Kids forgot his lunch?  Blink.

Now that I've made myself a little sad that I cannot actually have this superpower, what would you choose? 

Set the Clock at 30

My very sweet friend Elsha reminded me that since it's November, it's NaBlo-something or other I can never remember but that means I should try to write here every day for the month. And so I thought, hey, I've done this before.  Certainly, I can do it again.  Never mind I haven't written in more than 2 months and I don't have enough posts from the year to put together a month.  Never mind my month is about to get just a tad busy (read: plan & execute a Thanksgiving dinner for 30 people among various commitments already on the calendar).  Sure, let's jump in!

And so today, you get the gloriously interesting post about posting more.  Scintillating, isn't it?  Well, a least I have nowhere to go but up.  I hope.

In the meantime, look at my kids in their pre-Halloween glory.

The Million Hour Day

That's what today has felt like, and I am wiped.  Mostly the scale tipped to the side of crummy, and there was far too much yelling coming out of me mouth, so we're just going to write this one off, OK?

It did end with the kids on the couch with me for a viewing of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.  So maybe things are looking up.  Tomorrow will be better.

A Little Bit of Nothing

I think I've been subconsciously avoiding this space all day.  I mean, to the tune of, gee, let's clean the stove! instead of writing.  So let's just stick to some random bullet points, shall we?

• Sabrina was just dandy after I got her home and forced her to take an hour nap. She never ran a fever, and by the afternoon, was running laps around the kitchen table.  So when we went back to school to pick up Sammy, I showed her to Sammy's teacher and asked if I should send her to school Friday.  She said yes.  So, school.  
• I think her tummy trouble is related to a spill she took on the playground the previous day.  I got a call from the nurse telling me about the header she took off the monkey bars and that she had never seen a kid's face more covered in dirt or mouth so full of mud.  She even advised that Sabrina might have a tummy ache that night from swallowing some of it. 
• I was worried all day that I'd get a phone call from the school to pick her up (for a technicality on which I call shenanigans because policy says 3 vomit instances in a 24 hour period which we did not have) and have to endure a reprimand for not following policy (which would not have been true anyway).  I hate being reprimanded.  I don't like anybody thinking I did something wrong.  But it didn't happen, so I was just on edge all day instead of feeling guilty (for no reason) and generally disgruntled.  Win?
• I finally bit the bullet and hired carpet cleaners to clean the front of our house.  Yes, the carpet was filthy.  I have 2 children who have a talent for dripping apple juice all over the place.  Sue me.  The cleaner guy was giving me lots of judgey side eye and made me move my own furniture, which is fairly stinky.  But after I slammed me thumb in the train table (and screamed in pain), he got a little nicer and didn't comment after that.  The carpet looks great now, and there will no longer be apple juice anywhere but the kitchen.  Also, we are living Japanese-style and leaving our shoes at the door.  Prefect for the just barely above freezing weather that descended last night.
• Our power randomly went out this afternoon just as we were getting ready for karate class, so we couldn't leave (I couldn't get the car out of the garage, shut up I didn't want to manually open or close it).  Of course it came on a few minutes after class would have started.  Sorry, Sammy.
• The kids are now off for an entire week for Thanksgiving.  Excuse me while I stand up with my cane and grouse that we only got 2 days for Thanksgiving.  Now get off my lawn.
• What am I going to do with 2 feral children for a week while I get ready to host a meal for 25 people?  It's supposed to rain at least through Tuesday.
• Due to the weather, the first of 3 Thanksgiving dinners might be in jeopardy.  We'd be traveling north where the weather is usually worse, and the dinner's location is in a new pavilion that I'm told isn't heated (see above for just skating the freezing point temperatures).  But I still want to go.  And I don't want to tell the kids if we don't.  Sigh.
• OK, enough bullets.  I'm shot has it is.  Heh.  See? Terrible joke.  I'll just be going now.

Climate Control

Since I can't think of anything particularly interesting to expound upon today, I'll give you this little nugget from my morning.  I was at the Walmart auto center to get my tires rotated, talking to the clerk, when she stopped suddenly, threw open the tiny window next to her, and sighed, "It's so hot in here.  They crank it up to 90.  I don't know what the weather is in Arkansas, but it's sure not freezing here.  Stop trying to melt us!"

I guess you had to be there, but it was all I could do not to burst out laughing as I imagined some Walmart headquarters employee adjusting a giant thermostat connected to every store in the country.

And that's your  moment of my day.

I Will Get Into This on November 30

Good Things About Today:

•   I made myself call the insurance company to figure out why the pharmacy was trying to charge me 11 frillion dollars for generic medication.  I not only made the call, but also dealt with the pharmacy, didn't lose my patience during a 20 minute wait, and got my medicine got $6.
• The labs from my checkup came back, and I'm A-OK.  Of course, me being the perfectionist I am, I'd like to see some of the numbers even better.  I can't even believe me sometimes.
• Sammy's hearing is in the normal range for both ears even though one tube has fallen inside and sealed itself behind his eardrum.  He also had some wax in there, but no infection.
• I survived not 1, but 2 trips to Walmart in the same 8 hour period.
• I baked banana bread.

Not as Good Things About Today:

• I had to go to Walmart twice in the same 8 hour period.
• I still don't know if Sammy needs another (fifth) set of ear tubes, nor when surgery to remove the tube inside his ear (the inner tube? Ha, I crack myself up) needs to happen.
• It's just rainy and cold enough to label the weather as miserable and I have no desire to do anything except eat all the banana bread.

And so ends Day 4.  Fascinating, I know.

Is It Really November Again Already?

I guess it is, and I guess that also means it's that bohomoporolo business again and I'm, ahem, encouraged to write every day this month one more time.  Given the spider webs I'm seeing around here, I haven't exactly been keeping up every month, much less every day, so my expectations for myself are shaky at best.  But my intentions are good, especially since I haven't darkened this here blog in, well, awhile.  I mean to, I really do.  But life is kicking my backside quite royally these days.  Perhaps that gives me writing material?  You don't say.

So.  The line starts here.

Not So Quick Takes

I have been well and duly reminded that I have not posted as yet this year. Imagine me sheepishly staring at the ground and whispering, "I'm sorry."

I think my brain has been broken since Christmas.  Let me bullet point a few things and maybe I can job my gray matter back into business.

• The day after Christmas (Boxing Day, for my fellow slightly obscure holiday aficionados), I got sick.  Sicker than I've been in a long time (not even counting pregnancy) and for a long time.  I was completely devoid of energy, but I didn't feel deathbed horrible.  I kept doing things, because that's what you do as a mom (there is no sick time in Momdom, and that's a crying shame), but I chose slothy couch sitting over working out (the guilt did weird things to my head, because I know just how well that would have gone had I tried), had dinner delivered (which, ha, I would love to do more but I'm way cheap and this surprises no one), and took all the medicine in the house.  And then some more.  I didn't feel better until the day the kids went back to school, almost 2 full weeks later, and even then the cough took another week or more to go away.  As I said, I didn't feel  the most miserable and I did get my flu shot, but now I'm wondering if maybe the flu did get me (never had a fever, though).
• Well, that was some bullet point, wasn't it?
• I've been writing for Food Lush for the past year and a half, but this Friday will be my final post.  The site is shutting down for the foreseeable future.  And while I'm sad that this door is closing, I'm so thankful for the chance to branch out from this hidey-hole of the internet and write for another audience.  I've made so many friends through this experience, and that is what I will treasure.  I never expected this  opportunity, and I don't know what the future holds, but I can't wait to find out. (Thank you, Jennie, you are the tops.)
• Speaking of those friends, I'm really hoping I get to see a bunch of them at the Blathering this fall.  I went in 2011, but couldn't make it last year, and it really bummed me out.  This year, it's in Charleston, so I can see family at the same time (hi, Adrienne!).  I'm crossing all the things.
• There's the unfortunate instance of my having a birthday this year.  I'd like to skip right over it, except for the cake.  I'd like to remind my husband of my reaction to the surprise party he threw for me one year so he won't even spend a nanosecond considering a repeat.  But seriously, I do want some cake.
• I started the process of registering Sabrina for kindergarten today.  I had to fill out an incredibly long survey online, and next week I have to produce every document ever written concerning my daughter and our legal existence in this town at some meeting in which they will probably ask for even more information, and I'm not sure what's left.  Blood type?  A listing of milestone dates?  My college transcript?  Gah.  I'm nervous enough at the thought of my baby going off the legit school.  I don't need to take the SATs to get her in the door on top of that.
• I got an iPod Touch for Christmas (thankyouthankyouthankyou, Dad!) and I plan to use it as the smartphone I do not possess to take all manner of pictures so I can post them easier.  The only problem is I don't know what I'm doing and I can't figure out Instagram, and I told you my brain is broken, right?  Somebody help me.
• I am not currently planning on using the iPod for music.  I am old and crotchety and still listen to things like the radio and CDs for my music.  Now get off my lawn.
• Someday, I will be pulled kicking and screaming into the 21st century.  Today is not that day.
• I have, however, finally embraced the skinny jean/boot combination, thanks in part to Elizabeth and her What I Wore This Week posts.  I found myself drooling over her gorgeous boots in every picture, so with my Christmas cash and my deal sniffer outer, I went out and scored some awesome boots of my own.  And then the temperature shot up into the 70s and now it's too hot to wear them.  Sigh.
• Tomorrow, we are embarking on the final house repairs needed since the tornado/hailstorm last April.  It's time to do the ceilings.  I really don't want to do the ceilings.  First, I have to disconnect the computer and the TV, because they can't be in the room when this is happening.  Then, I get to watch as a bunch of guys make it snow in my house as they scrape the horrible popcorn off my ceilings.  I cannot imagine how long it will take to clean this place up after that.  And then, they won't even be done in one day (they have to let the new texture dry before they can paint), so tomorrow night, we will have no TV, no computer, and no toys because they furniture will be stored in the playroom blocking access.  Should be fun.  On top of all that, I'm really not sure it's even all that necessary.  Have I made it clear how much I am not looking forward to this.

OK, I have no witty way to wrap this up.  I'll just leave it with my fervent hope that February is better.  And that my vacuum doesn't die before I get all the ceiling bits sucked up.

If Only There Were Video

Y’all.  This is not my story, but my mom’s and my grandma’s, but I have to tell it because it deserves to be told.

A little background.  My grandma is 90 years old and broke her hip this summer.  She’s recovered quite nicely, but add that to her no longer being able to drive, and entertainment options are limited, to say the least. Her favorite thing in the world is to play the slots.  My mom takes her to the casino (about an hour and change (sometimes a LOT of change, bah dum bum) away) every month or so, and it makes her very happy.  My mom came away with a nice 3 figure win this week.  But that’s not the story.

(Also, apologies to my mom if I get any of the details wrong.  Mom, you can correct my in the comments if you wish.)

(I love parentheses.  Ahem.)

So mom and grandma were sitting in the open area grabbing a bite to eat when they notice this tall guy wearing a ¾ length leather coat, boots, and a cowboy hat, apparently looking for all the world like he’s about to go rustle some steers (or maybe buy a fleet of Cadillacs – it’s a toss up).  As he walked past them, my grandmother, who is the world’s foremost extrovert and has never met a stranger ever, called out to him, telling him just that.  He came over to them and Grandma asked if he was a real cowboy.  He said no, ma’am, he couldn’t make any money as a cowboy, so he had to go out and find a way to get rich and then he could be a cowboy.  As he shook Grandma’s hand and introduced himself as Kenny, he winked at my mom, who promptly fainted.*

Kenny.

Kenny Chesney.

He stood and talked with my grandmother for 10 minutes.  Neither he nor my mother outed his identity, and my grandma went about her meal thinking she’d just had a nice encounter with some dude named Kenny.  Later on, my mom Googled him, confirming that it was the real Kenny Chesney (just in case he was really just a doppelganger milking the situation), and showed his picture to my grandma.  “Well, that’s Kenny.”

“Look again, Mom, at his last name.”

And then Grandma promptly fainted.**

*Not really.

** Also, not really.